To The Mama Who Is Still Trying To Gracefully Transition Into Motherhood
More grace. Less judgment.
As soon as you find out you’re expecting, the one thing nobody can prepare you for is the unsolicited advice and comments. The occasional social exchanges are very much appreciated because they come from love and are genuine. But most of the time, it is opinionated judgemental advice.
I have received all these comments:
I heard this was planned… was it?
You’re only going to get bigger...
Are you sure it isn’t twins?
You look like you’re eating for two…
You aren’t planning on a c- section/ natural birth/ pain medication/ {que any birth related medical decision that they seem to think is their business} are you?
You‘ll sure have your hands full…
You look exhausted.
You know what causes that, right?
Do you know the dad?
Are you with the dad still?
Are you keeping it?
Are you prepared to have your life end?
Just when you think that is over, the one thing nobody can prepare you for is the unsolicited advice and comments after you just delivered a baby.
‘I heard the summoning a goat while line dancing to Cotton Eyed Joe, yodeling, burning orange peels and sage, all while holding your baby is supposed to help with colic. Have you tried it?”
If we are being extremely honest right now, some comments, advice, and “suggestions” have left me completely speechless and flabbergasted. How do you respond to the frequent, nosey, jaw dropping comments while staying calm and collected? What do you even say that remains the conversation closed and smooth? If you ever come up with a cleaver phrase, I would love to know!
I brought up all the unsolicited advice and comments because it truly does make you stop and question yourself sometimes…
Am I setting them up for failure?
Am I a good enough mom?
Was I too hard on them today?
Did I yell too much?
Did they eat healthy enough today?
What if they were grouchy today because they don’t like me anymore?
Do I spend enough quality time with them?
The list could go on and on forever. And the truth you need to hear is:
transitioning into motherhood looks different for absolutely everyone.
My heart sinks for every single mama who things there is a specific, graceful way to jump head first into motherhood. No matter how much observing you’ve done, research you’ve read, or children you’ve babysat, you will always mess up a couple times along the road. There will always be a handful of things you will do differently for your second child, then a few things differently for your third.
And it will all be okay.
What I wish I was told is as long as I am putting my 100% in on those rough days, caring for the child, loving on them fully, simply trying, it will be okay. Somedays will be more rough than others, some tantrums last longer than others, but the beauty of being a mom is experiencing everything to the fullest.
What make motherhood flow easier was truly taking each moment by moment, day by day. I can’t tell you the amount of times that I have questioned my very own capabilities. But those are the exact moments I sit there, pray, and breathe. We come out stronger on the other end through prayer and deep breaths. We come out more adequate for the next difficult tantrum and phases.
So, there is no secret… but my tips:
breathe + pray
take each moment by moment, day by day
reach out for love and support
know that there is no such thing as a graceful transition to motherhood\
give yourself G R A C E
everything will be okay!
I would love to hear how you loved this resource! PLEASE share, comment, and let me know if this was helpful! I hope that this was able to help you in some way, shape, or form since I know everyone is on a budget! I encourage you to check out ways to work with me here, or go binge on my podcast.
